Our human feelings are, at their most basic level, chemical reactions in our bodies.  There are love chemicals (oxytocin, which is responsible for orgasm & labor contractions), anxiety chemicals (the catochalemines, which get us ready to fight or flee), and on and on.  Our whole bodies are affected by our emotion chemicals.  I recently learned that we get butterflies in the stomach is becuase we have neurotransmitter receptors in our digestive tracts which can produce nausea and other very real physical symptoms in the presence of stress hormones.  Stress hormones can also slow the process of labor, which is actually pretty handy, as you don't want to give birth while being chased by a preditor.  Yes, we humans are a chemical soup of emotions all the time, and our emotion chemicals effect the physical workings of our bodies.

Now consider the fetus.  As a part of the pregnant woman's body, the fetus spends its gestation steeping in the chemical's of the woman's emotions.  At first, the fetus is pretty rudimentary, but it becomes more complex throught pregnancy, to the point when labor begins and the fetus is an active participant in birth and bonding.  And although I beleive that the fetus doesn't really have the technology to "think" or "feel" in the same way I do for most of the pregnancy, still, I cannot imagine that soaking in the mother's feelings would not have some effect on the development of the baby's feelings.  In fact, the more I learn about pre- & perinatal psychology, the more pro-choice I become.  If the fetus feels the mothers feelings, and in fact has their first expreinces of the world through the mother's feelings, and those feelings are negative toward the fetus itself, that seems generally pretty crappy for the person that fetus will become.

Of course, like any life experience, one can overcome the circumstances of one's gestation.  But I see this as one more reason why women should not become mothers simply because they become pregnant.  Choosing motherhood in one's own time and of one's own free will make the difficult task of sharing one's body with another being more joy and less invasion, and I truly believe that the baby born to a mother who loved and wanted it before or as soon as it existed has a better chance at feeling happy and at home in the world.  I encourage all pregnant women planning to carry to term and give birth to practice "fetal love breaks," in which the woman sets aside time during her day, espcially when the day has been stressful, to tell her fetus how much it is loved.  As the mom feels the love for her baby, the baby also feels that love. 

Love is our birthright, and a baby who is tolerated rather than loved is, in my opinion, a tradgedy.  I'm not saying all this to make women feel bad for having moments of frustration as they get another kick in the ribs at two o'clock in the morning.  Perfection is unatainable, we will never do everything exactly right, we will always have fleeting moments of anger and resentment at our children all throughout their lives.  But I think if a pregnant woman feels no love for her fetus, wants to be rid of her fetus, cannot imagine being able to mother the baby that the fetus will become, I think that if that woman wants to end her pregnancy, she should have every right to do so, because though she can hide those feelings from the world, she cannot hide them from her baby.

Posted at http://change.gov/page/s/yourvision:

Dear President Obama,

I am a mother, student midwife and abortion-care worker.  I am writing to share my experience as a health care worker and consumer both within the Western medical establishment and in the alternative health care field in hopes that it will help you in rethinking the way our nation does health care.

My daughter was born at the beginning of the year.  Being a parent is hard work.  I knew this was true before I was a mom, but I didn't know how true it is.  My ability to rise to the challenges of parenting comes in large part from the fact that I chose to be a parent.  I had access to and coverage for contraception (and, had contraception failed, abortion) to ensure that I would not become a mother until I had the money, partner, and stable home to provide for a healthy, happy child.  I don't know how I could have done this if I hadn't wanted to be a mother.  Poorly-timed pregnancy often leads to poverty for women and children. I know you are committed to access to contraception and abortion, and I want to say only that I hope that any government-sponsored health insurance plan will give women affordable access to the birth control and abortion services that help us raise healthy families.  

In keeping with my desire to optimize the health of my family, my daughter Ramona was born at home.  I was given no drugs during labor, birth or postpartum.  No machines or surgeries were required.  Minimal waste was generated, and all the associated costs of inpatient admission to a hospital facility were avoided.  In reality, most healthy women could achieve this type of  safe, satisfying birth outside the hospital at a huge cost savings to the health care system.  As the British Medical Journal states, "Planned home birth for low risk women in North America using certified professional midwives was associated with lower rates of medical intervention but similar intrapartum and neonatal mortality to that of low risk hospital births in the United States." (http://www.bmj.com/cgi/content/full/330/7505/1416?ehom)

I am studying to become a Certified Professional Midwife or CPM (http://www.nacpm.org/what-is-cpm.html), a non-medical health care provider helping women become active participants in promoting their own and their babies' health during pregnancy and birth.  It is imperative that women receive coverage for out-of-hospital birth and midwifery care by Certified Professional Midwives through any government-sponsored health care program.  In the Scandinavian countries, where infant mortality rates are significantly better than in the US, a much higher percentage of births take place in homes attended by midwives (and there is better access to comprehensive sex ed and contraception).  American obstetrics is opposed to midwifery care in the face of the evidence of it's benefits.  Please consider the midwifery perspective and help promote the Midwives' Model of Care (http://cfmidwifery.org/mmoc/define.aspx) as a way to improve the health of women and children while saving health care dollars.  Generally, our nation needs coverage for alternative health care providers, including midwives, naturopaths, homeopaths, acupuncturists, chiropractors and massage therapists.  Their wellness-promoting styles of practice save money in the long run by fostering health rather than responding to disease once it is already established. 

I recently went back to work at the reproductive health clinic where I worked as a paramedical employee before Ramona was born.  Now I am doing the insurance billing for this small business.  Health care providers desperately need a universal, straightforward, and streamlined electronic system for being reimbursed by third-party payers and accessing patient records.  Again, the money this would save in the long run is not insignificant. 

I hear my daughter stirring, and will go soothe her back to sleep.  Thank you for taking the time to consider my thoughts.  I am praying for your success in all things. 

Very Sincerely,

Alison Duren-Sutherland
Now you go there and post your vision.  He needs our help. 

Jamie and the baby are napping, but though I'm exhausted, I'm also restless.  Jamie has one more week left of his leave, and while he contemplates returning to a workplace which is not quite the same, I contemplate what it will mean to be at home with Ramona.   I hope we settle into a routine that involves my schoolwork getting done, the house remaining acceptably clean, and plenty of quality time.  I can easily see any one of these three taking most of my time -- hoping to find balance.  We've had an amazing babymoon, and are especially lucky that it was three moons long.  Now to be done with mooning, to create the new normal, but not get to used to it, as I'll have to find paying work at some point, and I still have no idea what that will look like.  There is no such thing as getting back to normal after having a kid, there is only going forward into the unknown.  I can't imagine not being with Ramona all the time right now, and I hope that it's not as hard on Jamie as I think it would be on me.