I recently met the woman behind the amazing sex-ed site Scarleteen. After talking for a few minutes, she asked if I would ever want to write some stuff about birth for Scarleteen. Um, HELL YEAH! Scarleteen embraces all aspects of sexuality and reproduction, and gives people judgment-free, factual sexuality information based on the assumption that everyone deserves a consensual, fulfilling sexual & reproductive life. And it turns out that they're doing all this amazing stuff for practically no money. Which means, they need some freaking money to keep doing this amazing work. I'm determined to generate $300 in donations from friends of mine. Friends in the family planning world will donate because we know how important good information is to people making healthy reproductive choices. Friends in the midwifery community will donate because we know that a healthy relationship to her sexuality can help to normalize a woman's birth, and that birth itself is a sexual event that people must be educated about. Friends in the queer community will donate because Scarleteen provides queer kids with much-needed sex ed which acknowledges their existence, which we never got in high school. So do it. Give these folks some money, whatever you can afford. And if there's a teen in your life, make sure they have this resource.

Emailed to Senator Maria Cantwell of Washington State:

Dear Senator Cantwell,

Thank you for being a champion for reproductive justice. In a just world, a woman would never make a choice about when, where or how to bear children because of what is covered by her insurance. She would not give birth to an unwanted child because an abortion costs more than she can afford. And she would not accept unnecessary routine interventions in a hospital that are paid for by her Medicaid when she would have preferred a cheaper physiologic birth with a midwife. You have shown time and again that you understand these issues, and in this you truly represent Washington state, where poor women can access Medicaid to pay for care with any licensed provider she chooses to see for her pregnancy, be it an abortion provider or a home-birth midwife. The language you championed in the Senate Finance Committee's healthcare bill which would require Medicaid to reimburse any licensed care provider working in a free-standing birth center is a step in the right direction for our nation, and I cannot thank you enough.

As you know, the House of Representatives has shown significantly less respect for women's health and reproductive justice. The Stupak abortion coverage ban is bad policy. Conservatives tout the importance of "patient choice" as an argument against any healthcare reform, but then they single out this one legal medical procedure and restrict women's abiltiy to choose to access that service. The Stupak ban does not maintain the status quo in regard to aboriton access. Rather, it would deny a woman the ability to purchase insurance covering abortion, even when that coverage will be provided soley from funds taken from women's own premiums rather than federal dollars. The Senate is our only hope for ensuring that this affront to women's self-determination does not become law. I know that you will fight as hard against Stupak-like language in the Senate healthcare bill as always do for women and families.

In August, I organized a meeting between a group of moms, dads and midwives and one of your staff members. We spoke about the importance of a real pulic option in healthcare reform, the specific challenges faced by women and young people in accessing comprehensive healthcare benefits, and the importance of midwifery care as part of a full range of reproductive health choices. Thank you for listening. Thank you for fighting for us.

God bless you,

Alison Cole Duren-Sutherland

In becoming a mother, I fell in many ways like I have fulfilled a destiny.  Whether it was taught to me by my culture, or whether I had an innate desire within me, I have always wanted to be a mother.  I conceptualize God as mother, giving birth to all things from Her body.  The Mother is an feminine archetype, and birth is her rite of passage.  I am musing more and more these days on what it means to mother, mother well, mother on our own terms, release the way we were mothered to become our own embodiment of Mother.  I am studying to be a midwife, the guide for women on their own journey into motherhood, and my own daughter is growing.

I believe in the equality of all people.  But I am also very strongly woman-identified, as a women's reproductive health worker and myself a mother of a daughter, and a woman raised in a house by mother and grandmother.  In my activism, I suppose part of me feels that men, so long the privileged sex, can take care of themselves; to make equality, we need to make things better off for women, so long subjugated around the world, even into the 21st century.  And I know that what is good for women is good for societies, as mothers are responsible for raising the citizens.  My work for women, my passion for women's issues is human rights work. 

However, my woman-focus can serve to alienate men, even my dear feminist male partner.  It's a bummer, and something I need to focus on correcting.  The other day, he reminded me that our home-birth wasn't only beneficial to me and Ramona, but also to him, and that my birth work is not only about women, but people, families.  It is absolutely true.  But full control of our bodies is something that white men take for granted and women & people of color must fight for; and men can choose not to participate in the realities of pregnancy, birth, and parenting but women cannot.  So, I fight for women.

Jamie said that he thinks this is a change in me, being so woman-identified.  I still care about humanity as a whole.  But my work in this life is with pregnant women, and as my learning progresses,  I am seeing everyday more clearly how all my work comes together.  I also know that I could not do this work, I could not support women (and families) without some balance in my life; Jamie's masculinity helps to bring balance into my life.  His support and love have been absolutely necessary for me to progress on my journey toward midwifery and women's health advocacy.  I am so grateful for him, and the family that we have made together.  He is the partner that I need to do this work. 

Had a day back working at the women's reproductive health clinic on Friday.  It was a good day.  I've been thinking lately that Ramona doesn't seem to be eating very often these days (the world's too exciting for her to waste time nursing!), but in the 10 hours I was away, I pumped 12 oz of milk.  I guess she's just a very effective nurser these days, and those little two to five minute feeds are actually really getting her milk.  I felt very accomplished with my jar full of milk at the end of the day.  I also really enjoyed working -- reconnecting with the other ladies that work at the clinic, making connections with that day's patients, and having everybody tell me what a cutie Ramona is were all lovley.  I didn't worry at all about daddy and baby at home together, and that felt good too, especially becuase they did actually have a nice day together.  When I got home, Ramona looked from me to Jamie and back again, and just smiled so big.  She likes it when our family is all together, and so do we. 

Remembering to trust that things will work out, even if I don't know how, is a major struggle in my life.  Rob Brezney of Free Will Astrology coined the term "pronoia,"  the sense that the universe is conspiring to do you good.  I am seeing the fruits of my pronia these days as the world around me reflects back the intentions I set.  I had said that I hoped I would find a new preceptor in the midwives who attened my birth, and that is in the words for the winter.  I have been saying that when Ramona was 6 months old, I'd start figuring out about work.  Now, I have hours available at the clinic, plus a new job opportunity that I'm pursuing which would be a litle more flexible, allow Jamie to cut back his work hours, and combine nicely with apprenticeship and on-call life.  These days, we talk about moving to the Oregon coast when I get my CPM to live there and set up my midwifery practice.  I find myself more able to believe that it will truly come to pass as I see these other intentions turning into realities.  I'm grateful. 

And a moment on the soapbox:  The federal Health and Human Services has proposed a regulation change that would expand the right of refusal to provide abortions for federal employees, and the wording is wonky enough that it may include the right to refuse contraception, and covery any type of employee rather than just doctors.  Head over to the ACLU website and let HHS know that this is ridiculous at
http://action.aclu.org/hhs_comment.  And if you or anyone you know has given birth in the past few years, I encourage you/them to take this survey http://www.thebirthsurvey.com/ which will compile consumer's comments on birth care and care providers to help other families be able to make informed choices about birth care.